Jake's school meeting

Ok, I promised I'd post when I felt better able.....DH and I went to a meeting at the school on Friday. We were meeting to put together some modifications to help Jake be more successful at school. He is extremely intelligent, he just learns in a non mainstream way. For example, when he was 8.5 years old, he was testing at a 10-11 year age level! Smart boy. Well, I had prepared a binder with EVERYTHING even remotely related to the issue at hand. I even wore nice clothes instead of the normal jeans and tshirt hoping that they would all take my requests seriously. Well, I read them my requests and they proceeded to tell me that "Yes, it all sounds workable if we can just get him to stay in class." I was a little confused because they've neglected to tell me that my son is bolting from class on a somewhat regular basis. I was glad that they were willing to give the majority of my ideas a try. He will be getting a set of books for home, more time for tests, etc.... His teacher proceeds to show us all the notes and "extra" work she's had to do just for Jake. I really feel like she was just crying "poor me". Now, I was very up front with her about Jake's issues on the first day of school. I told her right away that he's bipolar, trying a new med and can be difficult. I explained that he can be hard to deal with. She says, "Yes but you introduced him to me like that." For some reason, she can't seem to get over the fact that not only is my son bipolar, but he's aware that he's bipolar! What am I supposed to do? Lie to him? I am very open and honest with my boys and it will always be that way. So, teacher shows us all the emails that have gone back and forth (Yeah, so what!) all the unfinished work from Jake (Why she didn't send it home to be completed, I don't know!) Then she gets to a note that she found in his desk (Why she was going through his desk is a mystery to me) It was a crumpled paper, ripped in half that said "Kill Ms. Hardy" She then tells me that this kind of threat really worries her. She doesn't know what to do with a child that would write something like that. This is when I started losing it and almost cried. She was so busy crying poor me that she doesn't seem to realize how proactive I've been for my child. I then showed the entire room a picture of Jake at age 6 and explained "Yes, my child is bipolar, it's not unusual for him to say and draw very violent things. This is a picture of Jake one year AFTER his first suicide assessment" The room got quiet. I went on to tell them that I am and always have been working very hard to get to the bottom of things and do what's best for my child. She asked me if he sees a counselor weekly, I said "NO, he doesn't he sees his psychaitrist as needed but with our insurance, it's nearly impossible to get weekly appointments. She was making me feel like I"m some sort of horrible mother. I was trying so hard not to get really emotional. The director of pupil services had made it a point to be there (he doesn't usually come to these things) He offered for the district to pay for some regular counselling and he's also having the school psychologist observe Jake and a behavior specialist will be brought in to do the same. I was very pleased with all of this. As we were preparing to leave, the only ones left in the room were DH, teacher and myself and I offered to let her borrow one of my books on bipolar disorder to familiarize herself with the condition some more. She actually told me that she doesn't have time! Tomorrow, I am going to email the principal and director of pupil services and request a teacher change. I'm going to put it very nicely.....I feel so bad that Ms. Hardy is having to do so much work for Jake and I'd like to switch teachers to somebody more able and willing to do the job..... I certainly don't feel like being nice. I feel like saying, "my son deserves a teacher with a fricken backbone, somebody willing to do whatever it takes to get through to this student." I know that she doesn't like him. He knows that she doesn't like him. Well, we don't like her either!